Hope Changes Everything, by John Boring #BlogParty2011

Need HOPE in your present circumstances? I can think of no one better to speak into this reality you are experiencing than my good, kind, and wise friend, John Boring. If you scroll through this Blog Party, you'll find he has been a big part of this so far. That's just the kind of guy he is. 

Photo by Amelia Grace Photography

Hope for Suzi

While we were on vacation in San Diego in July, my lovely bride of 34 years complained about the weight she was gaining, which seemed to be piling on in her midsection.  She is a small petite woman who eats right and exercises regularly so the weight gain was put down to the indolent life we were enjoying in the beautiful Southern California climate.

When we returned to Phoenix she began to experience pain in her lower right abdomen and a visit to her doctor resulted in a CT Scan, which disclosed small tumors.  A needle biopsy confirmed that she had cancer, something called Peritoneal Carcinamatosis.  This is considered to be a metastasized cancer, meaning that the primary cancer lurked elsewhere in her body.  Tests were ordered quickly to find the host cancer and Suzi soon had a colonoscopy and then a PET-CT Scan.  Meanwhile, the oncologist sent the tissue samples back for reexamination and it was determined she had ovarian cancer.

My heart sank to the floor and all I could  think about was Suzi’s impending demise. I didn’t see how she could survive this onslaught, especially after reading up about her abdominal cancer.  This enemy explodes against the lining separating the stomach from the intestines, and literally hundreds of tumors appear in that area, much as the splatter of a paint brush flung against a wall.  The information I was picking up said surgery was not an option and only about fifty percent of those offered chemotherapy responded favorably to the drugs.  It had for years been considered to be a fatal affliction.

During the day I did my best to keep a positive appearance when around Suzi, but my heart was weeping at the thought that I would lose her one day soon.  I lay awake at night, unable to sleep, thinking about a life without her, reliving the wonderful life she had provided for us with her beautiful smile, her lovely-always-upbeat outlook on life, the way she cared for others and how tender her heart.  I made myself sick with worry and in my own heart, I had given up on any hope that she could survive this.

Suzi’s primary doctor referred us to a wonderful oncologist and new information began to trickle in.  He, in turn, referred us to a great GYN surgical doctor who offered even more optimism and hope, and for the first time I began to think this was not going to be the end of times for us, that they could indeed beat this monster that was taking over my beautiful Suzi.

Prayers from our many friends, offering even more hope and reminding me to keep my faith intact and my trust in God alive and well, brought me out of my funk and I began to see rays of light through all of this darkness.  Now, with surgery scheduled for Wednesday, September 21^st*, at a good hospital here in Phoenix, I’m up and excited to begin this journey.  Hope has changed everything for us, for good people have told us that we can beat this thing.  Prayers are being said and God is listening.  My trust in Him was put to the test and I failed to respond as I should have, but I’m back on the path now. I have HOPE and with HOPE and God’s love I am optimistic that we will prevail. We can still use some prayers; this thing is just beginning; please send some up for Suzi if you will.

Photo by Amy Reid (Also a Blog Party 2011 Writer)

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Read what John's pastor and our mutual friend and hero says of him:

"John Boring didn't always know how to love his wife exceedingly well back in the day. I think that's well documented. But now, in the season where everything beautiful, deep, real, strong, faithful and loving is needed by his bride, there is John gently walking with her in the backyard, sitting together, smiling, listening to birds. There He is trusting God, entering in fully, protecting and cherishing. There he is caring for her with such a servant's goodness. There she is, experiencing the love she married him for. Christ in John Boring is a sight to behold. Christ in Suzi Boring is so bright and unquenchable. For this God created marriage."

~John Lynch

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*You can connect with John Boring and get the latest updates on Suzi's progress by following this link to his page here. Thank you for offering your prayers on behalf of my friends. 

#Hope Changes Everything, by John Boring (Part 2) #BlogParty2011

You might find yourself in this story as well... So thankful for the person of Hope and how He indeed changes everything. My friend, John Boring, is back. I'm thrilled that you all get to hear from him again during our Blog Party 2011! (To read John's other post click here.)

My Story

I considered myself to be a Christian for as long as I can remember.  I believed in God, had no doubts that He existed, but I felt He was an elitist, favoring some while ignoring others. I fell into the ignored category but that did not stop my belief that there was a God. I simply did not rely on Him for much and He was certainly not a deity I could trust.  To my mind, my life was mine to control and if I was going to survive it would be because of my actions, not God’s. 

This God I believed in was not a kind God, quite the contrary.  He was vengeful and angry. He promised us things but He had doubts any of us could measure up to His standards enough to earn those rewards.  This image of God was the one given to me through the various churches I attended.  It was not a God I wanted to look up to if these preachers were right, and I eventually quit going to churches altogether.  Instead, I found God in the great outdoors, in the magnificent scenery of mountains, streams, lakes, sunrises and sunsets, and in the perfection of his creations such as birds and animals.  I found the peace and contentment I sought from churches in these outdoor delights.  Here was the church of the God I could look up to, the God of my childhood; the kind of God I could worship; a kind and loving God who could take time to create such wonder and beauty.

Then, in April, 2005 we lost our 24-year-old son, Dan, to cancer. During his five year fight, I had tried to help by being there for him and offering advice about treatments and procedures to try, but I never once called on God to intervene.  That job fell to Suzi, my wife, whose life-long and steadfast faith in God never wavered.  After Dan passed, I thought about her faith a lot and how I had not ever supported her in that area.  I did not attend church with her, did not join her in prayer. Those thoughts shamed me and I announced I would be in church with her in the future, regardless of the preacher and what he had to say about God; I would be there to support Suzi.

She was thrilled by my decision and in an effort to make it easier for me knowing how little I liked her pastor, she gave up her church and looked for another one for us to attend. It ended up being Open Door Fellowship Church in West Phoenix.  On our first visit there in the summer of 2005, just a few months after Dan’s death, we walked through the doors into this small, window-less auditorium.  No stained glass, no silk banners, no gold trappings.  Just a bandstand and a podium.  But, the place hummed with conversation as the congregation trickled in and took their seats.  People were greeting each other with hugs and kisses, laughing and talking.  When seated, many of the women moved close to their man as lovers do in movie theaters.  Others hugged children close to them as the worship music began.  Something inside of me began to stir, emotions began to rise that were unfamiliar and foreign.  There was something in the room that I could feel, a presence I had never before felt or experienced.  The emotions I was feeling quickly overcame me and I began to cry; huge, racking, sobs that had nothing to do with Dan’s death and everything to do with feeling God’s presence and His arms around me.  Along with this release of emotion came a sense of peace and contentment.  A feeling of coming home.

Then John Lynch began to speak and the words he delivered seemed to be aimed straight at my heart.  Doors opened that had been closed since my childhood and I understood for the first time that our God was indeed a loving and caring God, that loving me was one of His highest priorities.  It all made sense and in that clarity of thought I was changed inside forever.  I had also found my home, the church I had been looking for and the preacher I had longed to hear. It was the combination of the love I felt in the room and demonstrated so clearly by the congregation, as well as the theology preached from the pulpit in that little church that did it. And, one other ingredient:  It was God who directed me there and it was God who decided it was time for me to meet His son on that particular day.  It was God, who put His arm around me that morning and led me home.

That’s my story and it’s an ongoing love affair.  ODF is my church for life and loving God, and loving others in His name, is now my lifetime mission.

John Boring

P.S.


When Christ rolled into my life one special Sunday in 2005, three things happened almost immediately:  I received the gift of grace, it became easier for me to love others and I developed a big appetite for pie.  This means that I am a grace-filled, pie-eating, hug-giving man. I live in grace because God gifted me with it.  I eat pie as often as I can because I’m addicted to them. I give hugs because I can’t help myself; it’s the purest way I know to demonstrate my love for others.  I’m also an elderly dude who will become wise and respected when I turn 80 this November.  Can’t wait.

Hope Changes Everything, by John Boring #BlogParty2011

I'm so honored to get to introduce some of you to a dear friend of mine. John Boring has become very special to Stephen and to me over the past year or so. His writing inspires. His life encourages. And his warmth and hospitable spirit have captivated us both and made us his life-long friends and fans. He loves hugs and pie and people and his bride and friends and, most of all, Jesus Christ.

I asked John to join the blog party and was thrilled when he said "yes!" He shares with us a topic, not directly connected to our theme of "Hope Changes Everything," but his contribution here definitely conveys this theme. See if you don't see the dots connect....

Meet John Boring...

I’m not quite ancient and wise but I’m heading there fast.  Each tick of the clock takes me one second closer to where I can say I’m now a wise old man.  You don’t get to be considered old and wise, or even old and foolish - and get away with it - unless you put in the time. There’s no such thing as a venerable teenager, and no one listens to what a wise twenty-something has to say, but we all respect the sage old man whose words carry wisdom and experience.  I’m about to become that kind of man. I turn 80 in November.

LOVE

So, anticipating how wise I’ll be in a few months, let me jump the gun by telling you now what I consider to be the best advice I can give anyone.  Love.  Love everyone and love them well.  Let love rule your life. Give love generously and receive it graciously. Hand out love as easily as you would party favors but make it the kind of love that sticks, that can’t be ignored or destroyed, the kind of love that matters.  Love others the same way that God loves you; intentionally and relationally, without reservation and forever.

It took me 73 years to understand that advice and I give it to you here so that you don’t wait as long as I did to understand the power and the beauty of loving others.  Love is the great life-changing element that God placed inside each of us long before this world ever existed. He meant for us to share it with others and when we didn’t get that idea, He sent us His only son to remind us that love was His message.  One of the last things that Jesus had to say to us while He walked this earth, was for us to love others as He has loved us.

But, I’m not simply talking about spiritual love, the kind that Christians are supposed to sow and reap like farmers in a field, but also about the relational love between friends, lovers and families.  Love needs to be brought out into daylight, not hoarded in the darkness or kept locked up as a prized possession.  Love needs to be paraded openly where all can see, put on exhibit, waved like a flag, worn openly and proudly as you would a favorite blouse or shirt.  Love needs to be kept polished and bright and daily use will keep it that way.  Love needs to be shared with loved ones while they are here to appreciate it, not brought out only at funerals.  Love needs to flow from us as easily as water from a spigot and distributed to those we care about, not allowed to simply run into the drain and be lost forever. Love is more than a word it’s also a way of life; love can be seen in how we act, the things we do, the way we live.  Love is so many things but to us it’s what sets the quality of our life.  When we love, we live large.

Love is meant to be shared for it is meaningless if you keep it to yourself.  Love is especially valuable to your parents, your siblings and your children.  They need to know and believe that you love them.  Of course, you definitely need to give love to your sweetheart for the more you give to him or her, the more you will get in return. That’s the beauty of sharing love; the more you give, the more you get.

For many years I was a pretty self-centered guy, capable of love but using it best when it suited my purpose.  That was during a time when I considered myself to be a Christian but I really didn't understand the meaning of the word. It was only after I came fully to Christ in 2005 that I discovered what love was all about and how powerful of a force it can be in our lives.  Now, as a soon-to-be venerated, respected, wise, elderly dude, I am happy to pass on to you this valuable lesson that I learned about love and loving others.

So,  there you have it, but with one final thought:  You love others more easily when you have the love of Jesus in your heart.

Much love,

John Boring